Judo Day 1

A minister dies and is waiting in line at the Pearly Gates. Ahead of him is a big guy in a judogi with a worn black belt who has cauliflower ears and looks like he's been around the block a few times.
Saint Peter addresses this guy, "Who are you, so that I may know whether or not to admit you to the Kingdom of Heaven?"
The guy replies, "I'm Joe Johnson, Judo competitor and national champion for 17 years."
Saint Peter consults his list. He smiles and says to the Judo competitor, "Take this silken robe and golden staff and enter the Kingdom of Heaven."
The Judo man goes into Heaven with his robe and staff, and it's the minister's turn. He stands erect and booms out, "I am Joseph Snow, pastor of Saint Mary's for the last forty-three years."
Saint Peter consults his list. He says to the minister, "Take this cotton robe and wooden staff and enter the Kingdom of Heaven."
"Just a minute," says the minister. "That Judo man gets a silken robe and golden staff. How can this be when I have been preaching the gospel all my life?"
"Up here, we work by results," says Saint Peter. "While you preached, people slept; but when he entered the dojo, people prayed."



Well, I told you to expect a report on my first night in the new dojo. Here goes...

In a word... ouch. It has been quite a while since I've done any grappling, and my muscles are reminding me exactly which ones were used. Last night we focused on ne-waza (ground fighting for those of you who aren't judo players and don't speak Japanese). After warming up*, we proceeded to spend 40 minutes on chokes. So, for 40 minutes my partner and I took turns setting up and applying chokes using each other's gi's (uniforms) and forearms to squeeze shut carotid arteries. It. Was. Awesome! We followed the instruction time with several 2 minute randori (free rolling) rounds, and finished with some drills. It was a good first class, and I'm looking forward to getting back to it tonight. Hopefully we'll be working more throws and get into the stand-up grappling that is judo's trademark.

It occurs to me, that some of my fan base may be unfamiliar with judo. Well... I'll have to remedy that another time. While I would love to expound upon various martial arts for pages and pages, I expect I would lose what little readership I have amassed. In the not too distant future, I promise, I will write a (hopefully) not too boring compare and contrast that will let all of you understand my hobbies just a bit better. Until then, wikipedia has a pretty good article.

It appears today's post is big into brevity, as such, I'll leave you with some bonus material. Here are some quotes from my favorite president/judoka**. I'll stick his name at the bottom of the blog for those of you who may not know to whom I am referring.

Far better it is to dare mighty things, to win glorious triumphs, even though checkered by failure, than to rank with those poor spirits who neither enjoy much nor suffer much, because they live in that grey twilight that knows neither victory nor defeat.

Don't hit at all if it is honorably possible to avoid hitting; but never hit soft.

It is not the critic who counts, not the man who points out how the strong man stumbled, or where the doer of deeds could have done better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena; whose face is marred by the dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs and comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error or shortcoming; who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions and spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best, knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who, at worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly; so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory or defeat.

A man who has never gone to school may steal from a freight car; but if he has a university education, he may steal the whole railroad.

A man who is good enough to shed his blood for his country is good enough to be given a square deal afterwards. More than that no man is entitled to, and less than that no man shall have.

I have always been fond of the West African proverb "Speak softly and carry a big stick; you will go far."


*read "warm" as "dripping with sweat"
** Give up? Teddy Roosevelt.